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Chicken Salad on Who?

Sunday, September 17, 2006

Did I mention my Cousin's a Bitch?

Today started out really well. The president of our company praised me for a job well done. Yay, me. Anyway, the rest of work went well. Afterwards, I went home, checked out some internet stuffs, and got my golf on. I went over to the driving range and hit a few balls (golf balls that is... don't get the wrong impression, just because I made one man's balls bleed doesn't mean I do it on a regular basis). Now I'm sore... but plan on making this a regular thing, golf that is.

Anyway, my cousin and I have been playing phone tag for about a month now. I was avoiding her phone calls, all the while calling her back and rejoicing when she didn't answer. It gave me another couple of days without having to deal with her, because hey, I did try to call. :) Also, for about a week and a half, I was sick. For another week, I was on vacation. Seriously, she requires too much attention.

Anyway, she called today to tell me that she had my mothers hash (and no that's not the illegal kind). In the south, it's a kind of way they cook meat. It's good, you should try it. But I digress... So she says that it's in her freezer and that there isn't enough room in her freezer and that I need to get it right away because everytime that she opens her freezer it falls out... Okay... So, I call back and say I'll pick it up tonight... Well after the driving range, I jump in the shower, get dressed and go over to her house. Where I here endless criticism about what a crappy person I am and listen to her try to gloat to make herself look better than me... Sigh, she could be married to a doctor, she could be a doctor, with millions of dollars, I could be penniless on the street begging for money, drugs, liquor, whoring myself out ect., you get the picture, and she would still not be better than me.

I'm just saying.

Anyway, that lasted all of about 20 minutes before I claimed exhaustion and left.

OK, so you might not get the whole bitchiness picture here, but trust me, this is just scratching the surface. I may elaborate more later, but for now... Ta!

We live in interesting times...

There are just some things I'll never understand. Why would you risk your job, your family, your life for sex? I don't get it. Yes, it's fun, but it's not the end all be all of life. My pseudo-boss, hit on me... and I don't mean harmless flirting... he told me that he could do things to me, that he wanted to go down on me and vice versa, etc... He was drunk at the time, but that's no excuse, I've never believed that alcohol can take the blame for someone's actions... This guy is married with two kids, while not my direct boss, he is higher up in the company than I am. I was floored when he said this... I had never even considered him in a sexual way, as far as I was concerned he was asexual. Did I mention he's 20 years older than me? Ew. Well, suffice to say, I shut that down quick...

Sunday, September 10, 2006

Back in the saddle again...

OK, again, I dropped the blog ball... It's been over a year since I've blogged, but I've decided that I would like to start again. Perhaps the best way would be a recap of the past year.

Where to start...

Let's start with November '05, since nothing interesting happened between my nephew was born and then.

A couple of weeks before Thanksgiving my Dad told me he had pancreatic cancer, but that it was small and easily fixed with surgery. (He likes to downplay things so that people don't fuss or worry.) Anyway, the doctor told him that the cancer was small and that if he didn't do anything he would have 10 years before it ever became a problem. The best course of action would be for them to just cut it out. The surgery was scheduled for December 16, 2005.

The week of Thanksgiving, I finally got a job. I work in the aviation field, dealing with customer service, customer accounts, inside/outside sales, business expos, marketing, etc. It's a small company right now so I do many different things there. But I like the people, for the most part... we'll get into the gory details later.

Thanksgiving came and went without any consequence and before anyone knew it was the weekend before my father’s surgery. He and I played 9 holes of golf the day before; his doctor said he wouldn't be able to do much physical activity for a while after the surgery. It was freezing, raining, and the last memory I have of him post-op.

The surgery went well and he was recovering wonderfully, he was released from the hospital on December 19th and I returned to work. I went home the following weekend for Christmas to visit him and my mom. He cooked Christmas dinner; this is the last memory I have of him healthy.

I visited my parents the next weekend, New Year's weekend, and he was different. Tired all the time, out of breath, lethargic, swelling in the legs... we called the doctor but she said that it was normal. That he had just pushed himself too hard and it was catching up with him. She said he would be fine.

I drove back to my apartment (4hrs away) to get ready for a New Years Eve party. I was so excited because this guy I liked would be there and I could finally make my move on him. I had the perfect outfit... everything was going great. He showed up to the party and we flirted. Then disaster, another girl started in with the flirting and I found myself in competition. Well, I'm not as aggressive as others, nor was I sure of his intentions. After all I was the only singer girl there... until this other girl showed up. The second this other girl started flirting; he switched his attention from me to her. So I said screw it... He went home with her that night. And I certain that it wouldn't work out for them (it didn't they lasted all of 2 weeks).

Well, depressed and certain of my perpetual single status, I returned to my apartment to sleep. New Years Day I could be found frantically cleaning my apartment. I called my mom around noon to check in on my dad, she says he's the same... upstairs sleeping in the sitting room, he doesn't have enough energy to get on the bed. I'm worried, but my Aunt, who's a nurse practitioner, said that she thinks he's ok, that his pulse is normal and other medical stuff.

Later that day, around 10pm, my cousin calls. She's wants to come over. I say ok, but she'll have to make it quick because I have to go to bed because I have work the next morning 6AM!!). Anyway, she comes over. Her mom just called her, my mom called her mom. My mom wanted her mom to break the news, but I guess her mom was too busy, or maybe she felt it wasn't necessary to drive the hour it would take to get from her home to mine when she could save the time by sending her daughter, who only lives 10 minutes from me. But I digress... My dad died. My mom had called 911 to take him to the hospital because she wanted a second opinion. There hadn't been any change in his condition and she told them it wasn't an emergency, but that she could get him there herself. They sent over an ambulance, who loaded him up. He died in the ambulance... his heart just stopped. It took several months to find out what happened, but apparently he had blood clots in his lungs, that broke off and went to his heart. For several days, he was dying and we didn't know it. My mom had followed the ambulance to the hospital, none the wiser, and was informed upon arrival that he had died on the way... My dad was 56 years old, healthy and strong, a retired Air Force Colonel. He seemed invincible... We buried him 4 days later.

That was 8 months ago. Since then, I've bought a new car (a slate blue Toyota Highlander) and am thinking about moving in the next year or two. My mom is doing ok; she's back at work and will be moving to Cincinnati in three years, after she retires. Most things are haven’t changed, I still work at the same place and I still live in the same place. I drive to my mom's every other weekend to visit. I make sure her bills are paid, I'll take her grocery shopping, gas up her cars, and do other errands for her and with her, that dad use to do. She's never lived alone before, but she’s coping... Yeah, life is moving forward... I still cry at night, sometimes, when I'm alone. But it's less now than what it was.

Anyway... that's all I've got for now... stay tuned for the next installment, it'll be less depressing, you'll learn all about my work woes and hear some amusing anecdotes (at least I hope your amused...) Ta!

Wednesday, July 27, 2005

Auntie Aim

Yes, yes, it's been a while...I'm a bad, bad blogger. Even when I was a child, I couldn't keep a diary. What makes you think this would be different?

Anyway, I'm an Aunt! My nephew, Noah, was born July 21st. 7lbs 6 ozs, 22", dark hair, blue eyes...He's the cutest baby ever. I'll be flying to see the little squirt this weekend, actually tomorrow (thursday). Perhaps now my parents can give me a break.

Monday, June 20, 2005

The joys of someone elses wedding.

K, so my cousin is finally married. After months and months of planning, showers, gifts, ect. The wedding is now over. YAY, now maybe I can start saving money for things that I want instead of spending my hard earned money on her and her wedding. Not that I'm bitter or anything, it's just that it seems that since moving here in Feb. every spare cent I've made has gone to get in the dress, shoes, hair, gifts, bachelorette weekend, wedding showers, etc. I don't even want to think about it. Anyway, the wedding was beautiful and I meet a guy there. OK, so I have met him once before for about 3 minutes when he was passing though my cousins house and I was making cucumber sandwiches for one of the showers. But this time we had a chance to talk. He's not only cute, he's nice and he's smart. Sigh, but he lives in Columbia, SC. So I have to wait until next month when he moves down here, to date him. :) OK, he hasn't asked me out yet. But he will. I know it.

Make Me!!

How to make a ShinyFun

1 part anger

3 parts brilliance

3 parts energy
Add to a cocktail shaker and mix vigorously. Serve with a slice of sadness and a pinch of salt. Yum!

Monday, May 16, 2005

Drive by Shooting!!

I was in a drive by shooting. You don't believe me? Here's the story.

So this past weekend was my cousins' bachelorette weekend that I threw for her. There were five of us at the Isle of Palms in South Carolina. On Saturday night we decided to go out to dinner at RB's in Mount Pleasant. Mount Pleasant is an upscale town, a nice area. Anyway, we were on our way to dinner, the five of us piled into a new Toyota Sequoia. We were stopped at a red light, talking and laughing -- you know, having a good time. When suddendly, POP CRASH, the back window explodes into the vehicle. We all scream and duck, well, except for my bright ass who looks around for someone with a gun or something Then I yell, GO! Just lay on the horn and GO!!! We managed to get out of the street into a strip mall parking lot. I pull out my phone and call 911 while Lageree called her dad. The police show up and are crawling over the car. People driving by and staring while the five of us are huddled and trying to stop Karene's hysterical crying/laughing. I should mention that Lageree is 3 months pregnant and was the one driving. (The Sequoia is her father's.) Anyway...the police find a scorch mark on the ceiling in the vehicle that was made by a bullet. There you go, A BULLET!!! They didn't find the bullet but say that it could have been knocked out of the car or falled in the vents. We were very lucky, any other angle and it would have hit someone or gone through the front windshield. Had we been in a car, the window would have showered us in the backseat or the bullet would have hit someone. The police said that if it had, hit someone that is, it would have killed them. It would have hit the back of someone's head. Just imagine how lucky you would have to be to not get hit when there are three sitting across in the back seat. Anyway, CSI and all...this all lasted about an hour. Then we pilled back in the Sequoia went back to the hotel, unloaded the golf clubs from the trunk to the hotel front desk, so no one would steal them. Pilled into another car and went to dinner.

So, that's my story. Much more of this and I'll think the wedding is cursed.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

Memes for you and Memes for me, Memes for all your eyes to see...

Here are the rules: Pick 5 occupations out of the list and complete the phrase. Add a couple of your own occupations to the end of the list and then pass it on to at least 3 people.

The List:
If I could be a scientist...
If I could be a farmer...
If I could be a musician...
If I could be a doctor...
If I could be a painter...
If I could be a gardener...
If I could be a missionary...
If I could be a chef...
If I could be an architect...
If I could be a linguist...
If I could be a psychologist...
If I could be a librarian...
If I could be an athlete...
If I could be a lawyer...
If I could be an innkeeper...
If I could be a professor...
If I could be a writer...
If I could be a llama-rider...(by Ogre)
If I could be a bonnie pirate...(By Teach)
If I could be a servicemember...(By Jeremy)
If I could be a business owner...(By Blue 944)
If I could be an actor... (By Blue 944)
If I could be an agent...(By KelBel)
If I could be video game designer...(By KelBel)
If I could be a comic book artist...(By Stoli)
If I could be a hooker...(By Pollo Loco)
If I could be a crack addict (by Elizabeth)
If I could be a porn star (by Elizabeth)
If I could be a mime (by Garrison)
If I could be a domestic engineer (by Rick)
If I could be a chimney sweep (by laine)
If I could be a masseuse (by laine)
If I could be a taxi driver (by Brian)
If I could be a priest (by Brian)
If I could be a window cleaner (by Grace)
If I could be a gynecologist (by Grace)
If I could be a world leader...(by Scott)
If I could be a healer...(by Scott)
If I could be a proctologist...(by Dave)
If I could be a carpenter...(by Dave)
If I could be a reality-tv star...(by jason)
If I could be a go-go boy... (by jason)
If I could be a PR rep... (by Matty McMattMatt)
If I could be a fireman... (by Matty McMattMatt)

If I could be a lumberjack... (by ShinyFun)
If I could be a lesbian... (by ShinyFun)

If I could be an athlete... I'd be a male rugby player, and I'd get all the girls, because I'd be hot. I'd get all the hot gay men too, becuase I'd be hot. I'd also have a wicked cool accent because I'd be foreign and then I'd get all the hot people jonesing for me, because I'd be hot.

If I could be an innkeeper... I'd rent rooms by the hour and then I would blackmail everyone. (Come to think of it, that wouldn't be so much of an inn as a brothel, so If I were a madame...)

If I could be a chimney sweep... a lot of buildings would burn to the ground. Sorry, I was wearing suede pumps.

If I could be a crack addict... my mom wouldn't call my ankles fat, and even if she did, I wouldn't care. Give me some of that crack lovin'.

If I could be a masseuse... I would turn away all the ugly people, so I could touch all the pretty people. I would also date my clients. (Does that make me a whore? So back to If I could be a madame...)

I don't know three other people to tag so if you read this, keep the meme's alive!!

Tuesday, May 03, 2005

Which American Cities Best Fit You?

American Cities That Best Fit You:

65% Chicago

60% Atlanta

60% New York City

60% Washington, DC

55% Las Vegas

What Kind of American English Do You Speak?

Your Linguistic Profile:

60% General American English

20% Yankee

15% Dixie

5% Upper Midwestern

0% Midwestern